Thursday 19 April 2018

Moving on

moving on is never easy for me. 

getting over familiar faces and places is always challenging. it's been three months since I completed my studies and left uni. there are days when i keep on thinking about all the good stuff (and bad stuff) that had happened before. those memories make me tear up every single time. yo, i am that dramatic and nostalgic. 

I'd be lying if i say that i didn't miss the place. I've been going back to UM monthly just to experience and soak in the vibe of it.  i know there's an option for me to continue my study there but that's a whole different story. i just miss my undergraduate life so so much, it hurts. the adrenaline and thrill of catching up to a deadline, studying for tests and rushing to go to class when your late. i freaking miss all of those! not to mention all the movie date and makan session and other random things. most of my friends have already secure into a job and living their life. carrying on with the very next stage after completing their study. 

as for me, I'm still stuck in my cocoon. spending time in my comfy room, my safe haven. 

transitioning from one phase to another is always challenging. i experienced similar situation to this when i finished my high school. being in a dark and confusing place. i keep on questioning myself and trying to figure out my next plan. tbh, i'm more of a follow-the-flow kinda person. setting up goals and pushing my self towards it makes me feel stressed out. i can be hard on myself especially when i couldn't keep up with my goal. so yeah, i would very much prefer to keep things real and practical. 

being in the 20s is about seizing the moment and hustling. exploring new possibilities and chances.

in my case, i believe what's best for me is to take it easy, make one small progress after another. some people are born to hustle, shine and live in the fast pace of life. but each and everyone of us is unique in our very own way. there's no right or wrong way for us to approach on what life has to offer. each and everyone of us have our own values and virtues that we hold on to. each and everyone of us have set our own goals and plans to achieve it.

with that in mind, i've decided to get to know myself better, to know my strength and weaknesses, and later proceed on entering the very next stage (adulting and working life). i need to embrace my own self and be at ease with it cause at the end of the day, i only got my self. i am my own support system. as much as i hate to admit it, it's the truth. the people around you, your family and friends, they don't walk in your shoes so they may not understand what you're dealing with.

my dear self, live life at your own pace.

stop comparing it with people around you. i know that things can be overwhelming. you shouldn't feel like a loser if you fail to achieve things that you should be achieving at this age. and please bear in mind that life's not competition. so stop competing with your friends. you should only be competing and challenging yourself. take as  much time  as you need to truly bring whats best in you. you've achieve quite a lot of things in life, thus you should be grateful for it. if you keep on comparing yourself with others you may be filled with jealousy (maaan that thing is toxic, stay away from it!).

I believe that you can move on from your previous phase go into the next stage. you just need a little push and take a leap of faith. adult life may not always be filled with rainbows and butterflies but trust me you'll survive. you may struggle at first but that's how life works. common girl, i trully believe you can do this. so, let's gooo!




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